Mercy Rule

Its playoff time! Win or go home in Kansas high school soccer.

Last night I reffed my last high school game of the season. Wasn't much of a game. An 0-13 team against a 16-0 team that is number one in the state and ranked three in the nation. A result of having a one seed face a twelve seed in the playoffs.

It wasn't expected to be much of a game. But for the first twenty minutes I was surprised as the 16-0 team seemed to have difficulty finding traction on the sloppy surface and committed weird fouls and unusual offsides and inexplicably knocked the ball out of play on several occasions.

But ultimately, they got their game going and ran up a 10-0 score right before the end of the half.

And in high school soccer, the meant that the mercy rule was invoked and the game was over.

The mercy rule is this: Any time you are up ten or more goals on an opponent and you have played at least a half of the game the game is over.

It is a good thing. Prevents the score from being run up too high and players injuring other players out of frustration and anger. I know some people will say that it is a sign of the times that we don't play it out to the end.

I disagree.

But that is a rabbit trail to follow at another time.

But anyway, it got me thinking: Do I need a mercy rule in my life?

Are there times when I am so consumed with winning, with being right, with getting the last word in, that I forget about the other person and what it does to them?

Are there times when I plow ahead regardless of the situation bound and determined to get to the "finish" without regard to the cost to those around me?

Are there times when I forget mercy and compassion and let my competitive nature take over?

And unfortunately, for me the answer to those questions is all too often: Yes.

And that is not good.

Funny thing. After the game was over you would be hard pressed to tell which team won and which team lost and get the answer right.

The losing team chased down their coach and sprayed him with water and gathered at midfield as a team and cheered and celebrated. Maybe they were just glad that their season is done and they don't have to practice anymore. Don't know the reason why but their joy was there for all to see.

The winning team gathered up its gear and left after meeting with the coach. Not a lot of joy expressed. After all they were supposed to win this way.

And me? I was glad the game was over and I could go and get warm.

And as I wrote this I had the thoughts creep in that I had written about this situation before.

Guess I better learn the lessons this time...

Thanks

Today a refereed a soccer match.

It was a Under 15 girls match of the first division. The teams were very evenly matched.

The game was very even until late in the game and fairly physical. I thought I did a pretty good job of managing the game and letting the players on the field decide the outcome.

There were the typical comments from parents and coaches about what a horrible referee I was. I don't hear that every game but I did hear a it a couple of times. What is especially grating is when I am working hard to get into position and see something five yards away and a coach (or parent) forty yards away complains about the call.

Anyway, after the game, had the usual player and coach hand shakes and the coaches said "Thanks."

I debriefed with my assistant referees and we were pretty happy with how we worked the game.

And I got ready to run lines on the next game.

And then something unusual happened. A parent came up to me. That is usually a bad sign. It doesn't happen often. They usually want to complain or say that I took the game away from the players.

This guy came up and shook my hand and said: "thanks, you called a great game and really kept things under control."

I was kind of struck dumb at that one. This gentleman recognized what a difficult task it is and how hard I was working. And he appreciated what I (and the rest of the crew) had done.

I don't know what team he was rooting for. And it wouldn't change anything if I did.

Reminds me that I need to be more appreciative of the work that others do.

And tell them that I appreciate the work that they do a lot more often...